After watching dance concert, I realise that I miss the stage and I miss my erhu. but well, missing my erhu is a subset of me missing the stage.

From those nervous on-stage performances in sec 1 and 2 to the dont-really-feel-anything performances (excludes syf and concerts) in sec 3 and 4 subsequently.

Miss the applause after every piece you play. miss the trying to listen to what others are playing at the other end of the stage. miss the encore and the "faked" encore by the alumni. Haha, and zhenglaoshi walking backstage and reappearing in less than a minute to play our encore piece which we had practised beforehand.

and of course "my" erhu. From not knowing anything about it to knowing how to position it, the fingerings, how to tiaoying, how to huanxuan, how to huangong etc.. That's what kept me occupied for 3 and 1/2 years.
And then I decided that perhaps I didnt have enough passion to continue for another 1 and a 1/2 years. and i moved on.
But now, I miss the stage. It's been a long time since I genuinely performed on stage.
Not that I regret it, just that sometimes things can trigger your lost passion for something.